“Bloody Hell, You’re Old!” Card
- In stock, ready to ship
- Backordered, shipping soon
🧙 “Bloody Hell, You’re Old” Wizard Birthday Card
Not a compliment.
A magical observation.
This chaotic little birthday card features a fire-haired wizard delivering the devastating truth:
“Bloody hell, you’re old.”
Perfect for the friend, partner, sibling, or workplace menace who appreciates fantasy vibes, British sarcasm, and being publicly roasted on their birthday.
✨ Why People Love It
Because it feels like an inside joke immediately.
The mix of:
- wizard energy
- dry humour
- slightly aggressive affection
…makes this one ridiculously giftable.
It’s cheeky without being mean.
Funny without trying too hard.
And weirdly wholesome underneath the chaos.
🔥 The Design
A cartoon wizard.
Wild hair.
Maximum magical panic.
Bold typography and expressive character art make this card instantly eye-catching whether it’s handed over at dinner, displayed on a desk, or pinned dramatically to the fridge.
Honestly?
It looks like someone who definitely got banned from at least one wizard school.
🎂 Perfect For
- birthdays
- fantasy lovers
- Potter fans
- chaotic best friends
- sarcastic couples
- office legends
- people entering their “ancient relic” era
Especially ideal for:
- 30th birthdays
- 40th birthdays
- “you’re not old old but it’s starting” birthdays
📦 Card Details
Available Sizes:
- A6
- A5
- A4
Printed on premium heavyweight matte cardstock.
Blank inside for your own message, spell, or emotionally devastating roast.
Matching envelope included.
Plastic-free packaging.
✍️ Message Ideas
Need inspiration?
- “Another year closer to becoming a wise old wizard.”
- “You’re ageing beautifully. Unfortunately.”
- “Wrinkleus Maximus.”
- “At your age, birthdays should count as side quests.”
🚚 Shipping & Support
- Fast dispatch
- Carefully packaged
- Tracking available on selected orders
Questions?
Contact hello@keolix.com
✨ About KEOLIX
KEOLIX creates bold, playful, emotionally meaningful designs inspired by faith, comfort, and creativity.
From kawaii-inspired stickers to minimalist art prints and greeting cards, every piece is designed to feel personal, comforting, and easy to love.
Browse more favourites here:
Build your own vibe and explore more from KEOLIX here.
Customer support:
hello@keolix.com
Shipping & Returns Information
We strive to process and ship all orders within 1-3 business days. Delivery times may vary depending on your location:
- UK: 2-5 business days
- International: 7-14 business days (please note that international orders may be subject to delays due to customs processing)
Tracking:
For orders with tracking, please utilize the tracking number provided in your shipping confirmation email to monitor the progress of your package.
Refund & Return Policy:
We prioritize customer satisfaction and aim to provide a seamless return and refund process. Please contact us if you encounter any issues or have questions.
Damaged or Incorrect Items:
If your item arrives damaged or you receive the incorrect item, kindly email us within 7 days of receipt with a photograph of the issue. We will promptly send a replacement or offer a refund.
Lost Packages:
For international shipping orders, we offer a replacement or refund within 30 days if the package is not received within the specified timeframe. For UK shipping orders, the deadline is 14 days. Please provide your order details and tracking number to initiate the return process.
Refunds:
Refunds can only be processed to the original payment method. In cases of delayed shipments, we will issue a refund once the item is returned to us.
Returns:
We accept returns on non-personalized items within 14 days of delivery. Please return the item in its original condition and packaging. The buyer is responsible for return shipping costs unless the item was damaged or incorrect.
Contact Us:
Do not hesitate to contact us if you have any inquiries or concerns. We are dedicated to providing exceptional customer service.
