Rich and Unemployed Yacht Satire Tote Bag

The "Rich and Unemployed" Tote is what happens when yachtcore meets dry wit.

This bag doesn’t just carry your snacks and sunglasses—it carries a whole lifestyle. One that screams “early retirement,” “quiet luxury,” and “I have nothing to do today and everything to spend.” Whether you’re actually jobless or just acting like it, this is your daily reminder to live shamelessly and look good while doing it.

🚤 Meet the Tote Bag:

This tote features a minimalist yacht illustration floating effortlessly across your vibe. And that bold little phrase? “Rich and Unemployed.” It’s your new mantra. A wink to capitalism. A nod to the hustle-free elite. A shoutout to all the girlies living in their delulu era.

♻️ Tote Specs (aka Yacht Storage):

• 100% Recycled Cotton: Soft, strong, and ethically flexing.

• 130–135 gsm thickness: Light enough for beach days, tough enough for luxury hauls.

• Size: 40 x 38 cm (15.7 x 15 inches) — perfect for oversized sunnies, expensive water bottles, and snack-fueled detours to the marina.

• Plastic-Free Packaging (because we’re not trashy)

🌴 Use It When:

• You’re brunching in linen.

• You’re jobless but glowing.

• You’re mentally on a yacht, physically in Tesco.

Whether you’re packing it for a bougie beach day or strolling through Notting Hill pretending your inheritance just came through, this tote carries it all—while looking rich and wildly unbothered.

🎁 Gift It To:

• The friend who just quit their job (on purpose or not).

• The sugar baby who gets paid in Monzo transfers.

• The ex-corporate girlie turned “wellness entrepreneur.”

• Yourself, because this is manifestation in cotton form.

👛 Why You Need It:

Because you’re done carrying tote bags with "Live, Laugh, Love" energy. This is your reminder to live expensively (even on a budget), take naps at noon, and walk like you inherited a private island.

Let the peasants carry beige bags. You? You carry satire.

🛍️ Outfit Vibes:

• Crisp white tee + wide-leg jeans + this tote = “soft life” realness.

• Bikini + linen set + iced oat latte = trust fund coded.

• Black dress + heels + statement lip = unemployed but highly desirable.

🧘 Emotional Benefits:

• 87% more likely to make you smirk mid-errand.

• Doubles as a social filter: if they laugh, they’re your people.

• Adds +10 confidence just by swinging it over your shoulder.

📦 Shipping & Returns

• Ships in 1–3 business days

• UK: 2–5 days | International: 7–14 days (customs may add spice)

• Returns accepted within 14 days on non-personalized items

• Email: hello@keolix.com for help, tea, or tracking questions

KEOLIX: Loud. Funny. Boldly You.
We don’t design for the masses—we design for the mains. Everything we make is handmade, in-house, and rooted in chaos, confidence, and creative rebellion.

🛒 Add to Cart
📣 Then go be wildly, gloriously, unapologetically rich… even if it’s only in spirit.

💜 About KEOLIX

KEOLIX is not for the passive, the plain, or the “meh.”
We’re the brand your neutral tote bag warned you about.

Everything here is handmade, in-house, and intentionally bold. From rude birthday cards to weirdly loveable stickers and statement prints, KEOLIX designs are built to spark joy, start drama, or add just enough chaos to your day.

Want to make your order giftable? Pair it with one of our handmade cards — we’ve got sweet, sassy, and straight-up savage.

Not sure what to get? Check out our bestsellers — the people know what’s good.

Need layout inspiration or want to see what people are doing with their KEOLIX hauls? We’re always building aesthetic combos and real-life styling ideas here. Go get lost in it.

KEOLIX isn’t just a shop. It’s a vibe. And you’re in it now.

✨ At KEOLIX, we believe small things can spark big smiles. Every product we create is made with heart, humor, and a touch of rebellion. Whether you're collecting pins, gifting cards, or brightening your space with prints, you're supporting a brand that values creativity, quality, and meaning. Our designs are more than accessories — they're conversation starters, confidence boosters, and love notes in disguise. Thanks for shopping small and choosing bold. Want more? Browse our latest drops, join our loyalty club, or follow along on social for sneak peeks and giveaways. Stay bold, stay kind, and keep collecting what makes you feel like you.

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