Cook the Books T-Shirt – Funny Pun Tee
- Free UK Delivery
- Low stock - 6 items left
🔥 Cook the Books — Without the Jail Time
Is it legal to look this clever? Technically yes. But you will be turning heads.
Introducing the “Cook the Books” T-shirt — a dangerously witty design featuring a sizzling book in a frying pan. It's bold, cheeky, and just the right amount of illegal-adjacent for anyone who thrives on dark humor, dry wit, or... creative accounting. Whether you’re a bookworm, chef, number-cruncher, or just fluent in puns, this tee is your new uniform of clever rebellion.
💬 What’s the T-shirt Vibe?
It’s like walking into a dinner party and dropping a perfectly-timed dad joke that actually lands. This tee is for the overachievers with a secret chaotic streak. The kind of person who has color-coded spreadsheets and a secret recipe for mischief.
👀 Who Is This T-shirt For?
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📚 Bookworms who get the pun and chuckle audibly
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🍳 Chefs who like their humor with a side of sass
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💼 Accountants who know the phrase too well
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📊 Data nerds, mathletes, spreadsheet romantics
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🎁 Anyone who deserves a funny, unexpected gift that actually gets worn
Whether you’re deep in fiction or cooking up quarterly reports, this shirt tells the world: "Yes, I read. Yes, I cook. And yes, I’m hilarious."
👕 Comfort That Doesn’t Quit
Material: 100% Cotton, printed on durable Gildan Heavy Cotton
Fit: Relaxed unisex — wearable chaos for all
Fabric Weight:
• White: 175gsm
• Colours: 185gsm
Sizes: S, M, L, XL, XXL — cleverness comes in all sizes
Lightweight enough for book clubs and Sunday meal prep. Strong enough to survive a full day of client calls, library hauls, or deep-frying disappointment.
✨ Why You’ll Love This T-shirt
✔ Witty design that actually gets compliments
✔ Comfy AF — soft, breathable, and built for daily wear
✔ Punny without being corny (this is not your dad’s dad joke tee)
✔ Easy-care fabric: wash, wear, repeat
🎁 Gift It to the Person Who Has Everything (Except a Pun Shirt About Financial Crimes)
This is one of those “oh my God, that’s SO YOU” gifts.
Perfect t-shirt for:
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Birthdays
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Secret Santa
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Book club besties
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Coworkers who do your taxes
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Friends who laugh a little too hard at dark humor
Wrap it up with a spicy cookbook or thriller novel. Trust us — they’ll live in it.
🚚 T-shirt Shipping & Returns Info
Processing Time: 1–3 business days
UK Delivery: 2–5 business days
International: 7–14 business days
(customs delays may occur)
Returns & Refunds:
• Received the wrong or damaged item? Contact us within 7 days — we’ll fix it
• Missing parcel?
– UK: contact us within 14 days
– International: 30 days
• Refunds sent to the original payment method
• Returns accepted within 14 days (non-personalized items only). Item must be in original condition. Return shipping = buyer’s responsibility (unless it’s our mistake)
📧 Questions? We’re human. We care. We’ll sort it.
🖼 While You’re Here, Shop the Chaos
This tee? It’s just the appetizer.
We’ve got wall art that talks back, cards that actually get kept, and prints that vibe harder than your ex. Whether you’re shopping for a gift, treating yourself, or just procrastinating responsibly — our shop is full of bold, emotional, and unapologetically unique designs.
✔ Greeting cards that are funny, fierce, or heart-melting
✔ Art prints that make your space say “main character energy”
✔ Handmade energy. Maximum impact. No boring allowed.
🧠 Final Thoughts (From Your Brain in a T-Shirt)
You’re clever. You’re creative. You’re just chaotic enough to wear a shirt that references financial crime and cooking in the same sentence.
So go ahead — Cook the Books. Stir the pot. And look damn good while doing it.
💜 About KEOLIX
KEOLIX is not for the passive, the plain, or the “meh.”
We’re the brand your neutral tote bag warned you about.
Everything here is handmade, in-house, and intentionally bold. From rude birthday cards to weirdly loveable stickers and statement prints, KEOLIX designs are built to spark joy, start drama, or add just enough chaos to your day.
Want to make your order giftable? Pair it with one of our handmade cards — we’ve got sweet, sassy, and straight-up savage.
Not sure what to get? Check out our bestsellers — the people know what’s good.
Need layout inspiration or want to see what people are doing with their KEOLIX hauls? We’re always building aesthetic combos and real-life styling ideas here. Go get lost in it.
KEOLIX isn’t just a shop. It’s a vibe. And you’re in it now.
✨ At KEOLIX, we believe small things can spark big smiles. Every product we create is made with heart, humor, and a touch of rebellion. Whether you're collecting pins, gifting cards, or brightening your space with prints, you're supporting a brand that values creativity, quality, and meaning. Our designs are more than accessories — they're conversation starters, confidence boosters, and love notes in disguise. Thanks for shopping small and choosing bold. Want more? Browse our latest drops, join our loyalty club, or follow along on social for sneak peeks and giveaways. Stay bold, stay kind, and keep collecting what makes you feel like you.
Shipping & Returns Information
We strive to process and ship all orders within 1-3 business days. Delivery times may vary depending on your location:
- UK: 2-5 business days
- International: 7-14 business days (please note that international orders may be subject to delays due to customs processing)
Tracking:
For orders with tracking, please utilize the tracking number provided in your shipping confirmation email to monitor the progress of your package.
Refund & Return Policy:
We prioritize customer satisfaction and aim to provide a seamless return and refund process. Please contact us if you encounter any issues or have questions.
Damaged or Incorrect Items:
If your item arrives damaged or you receive the incorrect item, kindly email us within 7 days of receipt with a photograph of the issue. We will promptly send a replacement or offer a refund.
Lost Packages:
For international shipping orders, we offer a replacement or refund within 30 days if the package is not received within the specified timeframe. For UK shipping orders, the deadline is 14 days. Please provide your order details and tracking number to initiate the return process.
Refunds:
Refunds can only be processed to the original payment method. In cases of delayed shipments, we will issue a refund once the item is returned to us.
Returns:
We accept returns on non-personalized items within 14 days of delivery. Please return the item in its original condition and packaging. The buyer is responsible for return shipping costs unless the item was damaged or incorrect.
Contact Us:
Do not hesitate to contact us if you have any inquiries or concerns. We are dedicated to providing exceptional customer service.
